Ghosts in my Room
Well, not exactly, but I am sure this was more than a dream. First you should know some history.
For the last year, I have been having a strange thing happen to me. Once in a while, shortly after I fall asleep and begin to dream, I will start feeling strange (in my dream). I will begin to pass out, and start falling to the floor. I would usually try to move and yell out for help, but then wake up realizing the reason I can't move is because I am sleeping. My wife would tell me I was making a very strange yelling noise. I still don't know exactly why this is happening, but I have a hunch that my mind at least partially wakes up and realizes that I can't move, because I am asleep. In my dream I try to explain the feeling by passing out in the dream.
Well, lately I have been diagnosed with a heart problem that actually causes me to come close to passing out. The doctor told me that if it does happen, don't panic, just lay on the floor and pass out if I need to. Once on the floor, my blood pressure goes back up and I wake up again. Thankfully so far it never got to that point.
Ok, now on to what happened. I had just gone to sleep, and had started dreaming. I was dreaming that my wife and I were in a diner at a table talking to an older lady. I don't know who she was, and I don't remember what she was talking about, but I know it was mostly unimportant chatting.
Anyway, I started to feel that strange feeling again, and knew I was passing out. It kept getting worse, but for the first time I didn't panic and try to yell out. Instead, I just put my head on the table, stayed calm, and let it happen, remembering what my doctor had told me about my heart.
The dream went away, basically shut off, and I regained consciousness and realized I was in my bed. I am guessing that I was simply waking up. As the visual of the dream faded, a very interesting thing happened. As I watched the diner face away, I could still see the woman chatting away. Only now she was in my bedroom, standing next to my bed. Even stranger, I could see her, and my bedroom, through my closed eyes.
Everything was bathed in a strange light, very high contrast, that didn't seem to come from anywhere in particular. Everything seemed almost outlined in the strange light, even the woman, who was still chatting. I could sort of hear a voice, but I could no longer tell what she was saying. She seemed happy about it though.
I decided to open my eyes so I could tell if what I was seeing was actually my room, as it was beginning to fade. I took a few quick mental notes of exactly where things were and opened my eyes. I don't know how to describe it, but once my eyes were open something about how I was seeing changed, as if I was using a different pair of eyes. It's like my brain thought "Oh, there are my eyes, I was looking through the wrong pair." Compared to when my eyes were closed, it seemed dark, lit only by my alarm clock. But everything was exactly as I saw it with my eyes closed, except the woman was no longer there.
Another thing I simply can't explain is that for some reason I was, and still am, SURE that in some way, what I was seeing was reality, more so anyway than what I am seeing with my eyes open. It felt like I was finally actually, truly SEEING.
I don't make any claims to what was going on, including the possibility that I was still dreaming, but that's what happened. And I don't believe I was still dreaming. My wife thinks that I saw her in the room because I was just dreaming about her. I believe that the reason she was in the dream was because she was there in the room.
For the last year, I have been having a strange thing happen to me. Once in a while, shortly after I fall asleep and begin to dream, I will start feeling strange (in my dream). I will begin to pass out, and start falling to the floor. I would usually try to move and yell out for help, but then wake up realizing the reason I can't move is because I am sleeping. My wife would tell me I was making a very strange yelling noise. I still don't know exactly why this is happening, but I have a hunch that my mind at least partially wakes up and realizes that I can't move, because I am asleep. In my dream I try to explain the feeling by passing out in the dream.
Well, lately I have been diagnosed with a heart problem that actually causes me to come close to passing out. The doctor told me that if it does happen, don't panic, just lay on the floor and pass out if I need to. Once on the floor, my blood pressure goes back up and I wake up again. Thankfully so far it never got to that point.
Ok, now on to what happened. I had just gone to sleep, and had started dreaming. I was dreaming that my wife and I were in a diner at a table talking to an older lady. I don't know who she was, and I don't remember what she was talking about, but I know it was mostly unimportant chatting.
Anyway, I started to feel that strange feeling again, and knew I was passing out. It kept getting worse, but for the first time I didn't panic and try to yell out. Instead, I just put my head on the table, stayed calm, and let it happen, remembering what my doctor had told me about my heart.
The dream went away, basically shut off, and I regained consciousness and realized I was in my bed. I am guessing that I was simply waking up. As the visual of the dream faded, a very interesting thing happened. As I watched the diner face away, I could still see the woman chatting away. Only now she was in my bedroom, standing next to my bed. Even stranger, I could see her, and my bedroom, through my closed eyes.
Everything was bathed in a strange light, very high contrast, that didn't seem to come from anywhere in particular. Everything seemed almost outlined in the strange light, even the woman, who was still chatting. I could sort of hear a voice, but I could no longer tell what she was saying. She seemed happy about it though.
I decided to open my eyes so I could tell if what I was seeing was actually my room, as it was beginning to fade. I took a few quick mental notes of exactly where things were and opened my eyes. I don't know how to describe it, but once my eyes were open something about how I was seeing changed, as if I was using a different pair of eyes. It's like my brain thought "Oh, there are my eyes, I was looking through the wrong pair." Compared to when my eyes were closed, it seemed dark, lit only by my alarm clock. But everything was exactly as I saw it with my eyes closed, except the woman was no longer there.
Another thing I simply can't explain is that for some reason I was, and still am, SURE that in some way, what I was seeing was reality, more so anyway than what I am seeing with my eyes open. It felt like I was finally actually, truly SEEING.
I don't make any claims to what was going on, including the possibility that I was still dreaming, but that's what happened. And I don't believe I was still dreaming. My wife thinks that I saw her in the room because I was just dreaming about her. I believe that the reason she was in the dream was because she was there in the room.
posted by Calan at 21:10
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home